'Holy Motors' - The Strangest Film To Come Out Of Cannes This Year

The Cannes film festival is still one of the most important film festivals in the world in terms of breaking films and creating buzz. The festival is single handily responsible for the careers of such directors as Quentin Tarantino & Kevin Smith, and has made the Weinstein Company one of the biggest players in the movie industry. Those of you non film snobs may not know much about the festival besides its name... so here is a quick crash course. The main award of the festival is called the Palm d'Or. The winner of the Palm d'Or gets all types of free press, praise, and usually ends up a successful film do to the push from the win. But when there is an upset (as there was this year) sometimes more than one film can benefit from just being nominated. This year a movie called 'Amour' took the top prize, but it is the very weird and bizarre 'Holy Motors' that is generating the most buzz. It comes from controversial film director Leos Carax & has a few recognizable names starring in it (Kylie Minogue, Eva Mendes), and judging by the trailer it is bat shit crazy. Maybe that is why it didn't get the win... it may have been too weird for its own good. Check the full trailer out after the jump and keep your eyes peeled for 'Holy Motors' to be hitting a indy cinema near you...

Goddamn Paul Rudd... Now This Is #Winning!!!!

These are some pics that came out of last weeks Spirit Awards. Now I like Paul Rudd as much as the next guy, don't get me wrong. I like his flicks, he makes me laugh. But that doesn't give him the go ahead to fondle the hotness that is Eva Mendes on stage... and then recieve a cock grab from the even hotter Rosario Dawson. What the fuck is going on at the Spirit Awards? I watching this shit next year... fuck the lame ass Oscars. Rudd must be hanging with Mr Sheen, because this is what I call winning!!!

A Small Request From A Big Fan

I am going to start this post by saying that I have been a big fan of Mark Wahlberg as an actor for a very long time. I always liked the grittiness that he brought to his roles, and the tough guy attitude that always poured through his performances even if that wasn't the kind of role he was playing. Think about it: Basketball Diaries, Fear, Boogie Nights, The Perfect Storm, Shooter, Invincible, The Departed, The Italian Job... the list if his hits goes on and on. But lately, something has kind of turned for Wahlberg... and honestly, its a turn for the worse. Think about it.

Your welcome...

I think the decline started in 2008 with We Own The Night. A total shitfest of a movie (my opinion) that featured such a unbelievable dream cast (Joaquin Phoenix, Robert Duvall, and Wahlberg... and the wonderful tits of Eva Mendes) that it probably sucked because they couldn't live up to the potential they all bring to a film.

Then came the truly dark days: The Happening and Max Payne. I kind of give Max Payne a pass because its a video game movie (9.8 out of 10 of them suck ass) so there was probably no shot of the one being good. But in my opinion, The Happening is the worst movie ever made. EVER MADE. Not just in 2008, or worst horror movie ever, or worst M Night movie ever... it is by far the worst film I have ever seen. Personally, I feel that the reason I have such contempt for it falls squarely on Wahlberg's overall dreadful performance. He plays an quiff of a character (this dick wears a mood ring... really) that is so totally opposite of everything we know Mark to be. How the fuck could he ever agree to play such a fairy type role? Couple his unbelievably effeminate performance with such ridiculous ideas that the wind is a villain and a script filled with disastrous dialogue and you got a movie that takes a great premise (why is everybody committing unexplained suicide?) and completely fucks it up. Not to mention, how the fuck can you ruin a movie that stars the absolutely gorgeous Zooey Deschanel? Fuck you, The Happening... you are the worst movie ever.

Wahlberg followed The Happening with a cool cameo in the Tina Fey/Steve Carrell comedy Date Night and a decent role in The Lovely Bones (an underrated movie... great!). So things were looking up for Marky Mark... until The Other Guys came out. I know the film was financially successful, and is praised as being funny. But I propose that all of these things are true IN SPITE of Wahlberg's performance, not because of it. He has become an over actor now, and he is trying way to hard to be a tough guy (Maybe cause of his gay bird role in The Happening... overcompensation anyone?) He is supposed to be the straight man to Will Ferrell's idiot... I get it. But does he have to be a dick of epic proportions? Not to mention the promotion he did on the MTV Awards and SNL where he kept the tough guy shtick up, cursing and threatening to beat everybody up... what a dickbag. Which brings me to the point of this whole rant:

Mark, please leave The Crow remake alone. Please. For the love of Christ. /Film has reported that Wahlberg has been offered the lead role in this reboot/remake. While I hope this is a mistake, usually the guys over at /Film don't fuck around. It has also been reported by Cinemablend.  Fuck. Don't do it Mark, please. Here are my 3 reasons why:

1. Brandon Lee is The Crow. That's that. I don't acknowledge any of the other 2,200 sequels, prequels an shitfests that have come out in the Crow franchise (that hurt to even type... franchise? More like Shitchise). The fucking guy took a bullet on the set of the movie and DIED, perpetuating the curse on the Lee family that started with his Dad. You guys have fucked his legacy up enough... don't let Wahlberg and his recent track record of terrible performances make this any worse than it already is.
2. Why would you want to play this role? It can only go bad for you... whats the upside, honestly? This film is probably going to suck worse then Reindeer Games, so get yourself out of the way now. For the sake of your career....
3. You got The Fighter coming up, which co-stars Christian Bale and tells the story of boxer Irish Mickey Ward. This film is made for you, and hopefully will be great. Maybe through this you will gain some respect from everybody again and become a top notch actor. Get this one out before you even sign on to do anything else.

I hope Mark listens, but he probably won't. I truly love this guy as an actor. I also think its remarkable that he rose to such a highly regarded status because I never thought he had it in him. But now that he has crashed and burned on camera, can he turn it around? Lets hope so... I'm rooting for you Mark! Am I crazy? Do you disagree? Tell me how you feel about all of this Mark Wahlberg related hoopla in the comment section below. I can't wait to hear all your thoughts.

Proof That Their Is A God: Eva Mendes Edition

No Words... Just Thanks!!!