Did Kirstie Alley Try To Eat Her Dance Partner On Live TV?

Get In My Belly!!!

Hahahahahahaha.... thats what you get when you sub an elephant in where a female celebrity under 175 lbs should be. I'm not saying they all gotta be Nicole Scherzinger (why not?), but they should be more in shape than Gorilla Grodd...  er, um, I mean Kirstie Alley. Check the video for yourself (fall takes place around the :20 second mark):



I got this video via The Superficial. Here is what they added:

This also led to Kirstie falling to the floor which surprisingly did not trigger the massive San Andreas seismic event geologists have been anticipating....

...As of this post, ballistic experts are still searching the studio for Maksim’s kneecap which thankfully was pointed away from the audience.

Hahaahahahahahaha... If only she would have fell ON him. That would have really sealed it for me. Meanwhile, I read elsewhere that they went on to recieve a higher score for this routine then last weeks, despite not blowing out a thigh muscle and tumbling to the floor. Whatever credability this show did have just went FALLING out the window (see what I did there... Falling? LOL....). Isn't this show called Dancing With The Stars? When did they start filming this at Sea World? Really... I can do this all day.

Reality Check #6 by Kate Jones: The End Of The Spring TV Season

Well, the end of the Spring television season is upon us, so that means we have WINNERS all over the place… Let’s talk about who won some of our favorite reality shows!


The Amazing Race

Congratulations to Daniel & Jordan, the gay brothers! I don’t think anyone really expected them to win this, being against the cowboys and all, but they really turned it up in the final leg (in San Francisco). The cowboys finished second and the dating models finished third. At the very end there was some obvious bitterness by Carol and Brandy, the mean, dating lesbians. They were still insisting that the Cowboys should have been U-turned instead of them, which is a little stupid, considering the Cowboys didn’t win! Shut up and be gracious in defeat, mean ladies!!!! Congrats to Dan and Jordan. These guys were over-the-top ecstatic over winning this race!

America’s Next Top Model

Congratulations to Krista, who won in the finale over Raina. Both girls were great, but it came down to who had the better walk, I guess. I honestly thought that Raina had the better pictures, but I am not the expert! So, another year, and another pick of mine gets to finals and loses!

PS- Tyra, I hate you and your smiling face!

Dancing With the Stars

I don’t watch this much…if ever… but Nicole, the Pussycat Doll, won. Are you surprised? Yeah, me neither.

American Idol

The right two went to the finale, but the wrong person one. I am sorry. Lee DeWyze is wonderful, but Crystal Bowersox is better. But since I didn’t vote, I have no right to complain. Keep that in mind when the next election cycles come up for your government officials!

Celebrity Apprentice

Bret Michaels wins!!! YAYY! The only person that I wanted to win a reality show that actually won! For a reality maven, I really had a shitty record this season! Anyway, he beat Holly Robinson-Peete who did an amazing job for her HollyRod Foundation for Autistic Kids (Bret’s money went to Diabetes research). I highly recommend giving to either one of these amazing charities, or you can donate to the Autism Walk that I am doing on June 13 at the South Street Seaport!

The Biggest Loser

I love the Biggest Loser finale! Seeing these people love almost 50% of their bodyweight is a totally amazing thing! Congratulations to Mike, for winning the money and the title of Biggest Loser, but also, great job Ashley and Daris for making it that far and looking as AMAZING as you did. Also, congratulations to all the people who lost so much weight at home and to Koli who won the At Home prize.

Survivor: Heroes Vs. Villains

Well, just as expected, Russell and Parvati went to the finals but Russell made the serious mistake of bringing someone who he didn’t think was a threat to him in Sandra Diaz-Twine. He didn’t realize some of the moves Sandra was making and perceived her lack of physicality as total weakness. She had an immunity idol, she tried play after play to get Russell out and she made the move after Rob was eliminated to get rid of Coach. That being said, I am not sure that Sandra was the most deserving. I think Parvati is awesome. Dangerous, yes. Sneaky, yes. But awesome, nonetheless. Russell won the at home prize for the second time and was bitching about how America should have a vote in who wins Survivor… pure idiocy coming from the troll-like sore loser. If you don’t like the rules, don’t play the game!!!! Either way, it was the BEST season of Survivor that I can remember watching in full. Brilliance!!

Coming Up This Summer

I have promised Jeff Bond that I would watch Jerseylicious. I have been avoiding this, but am going to start sometime this week. You will be exposed to the recaps, and I’m sorry in Advance.

BIG BROTHER!!!!!! Until I am a teacher, this will remain to be the best thing about my summer! This show gets me going even more then Survivor. It starts in the beginning of July and is on 3 days a week! I can’t wait for another summer of backstabbing and showmancing and slop and silly challenges and twists! I am bursting with excitement, people!

I will also be watching Hell’s Kitchen. I usually tend to avoid The Bachelorette, America’s Got Talent, So You Think You Can Dance and Last Comic Standing, but if you would like me to take a look at something, please let me know!

Rest in Peace:

I just want to take a minute and say goodbye to some of the shows that I watch that have been cancelled: Flash Forward, Heroes, Cold Case, Law and Order, and Mercy.

I think that all of these shows had a great premise. Heroes just faded out at the end- a victim of bad writing. Flash Forward just couldn’t get the ratings, even though it had a very good premise! Cold Case was a great crime show, but just wasn’t as good as the others in its genre and the same goes for Mercy (which had a great cliff hanger to end the season that I unfortunately will never see resolved) Its been 20 seasons for Law and Order, tying the record that Bonanza set for longest running TV drama. It may get picked up by another network like TNT just to allow it to break the record.

Note: Did anyone see Jimmy Kimmell after the LOST finale? I guess I wasn’t the only person imagining a LOST/Survivor merger!

Brooklyn, We Get Hard... We Get Hard!!!!

Sorry Jay, but I had to change your boast about Brooklyn to fit what will be happening to men all over the country in the next few weeks... The Sports Illustrated 2010 Swimsuit Issue hit newstands on Tuesday Feb. 9th and it features the lovely Brooklyn Decker on the cover. Not a bad choice, the beautiful Mrs. Andy Roddick dons a teeny weeny yellow bikini on the cover of the annual celebration of women and bathing suits put out each year by the sports mag. The issue is often the topic of intense debates amongst the american male population and a good cover shot can make or break a model.

The magazine features tons of chicks in bathing suits... Duh!!! But it also has some really cool themed photo shoots. The first one is a Dancing With The Stars Cast shoot catching your favorite celebrity dancers and their partners in beach attire. Then there is a body painting spread which features a "Soccer Uniforms From Around The World Theme". Twilight's Ashley Greene also has a body painting layout. A few of the American Stars from the upcoming 2010 Winter Olympics in Vancouver raise the heat in an otherwise cold weather setting. All in all, a solid effort by the boys and girls over at Sports Illustrated. Thank you for what you do year after year. Mena across America are forever in your debt... Enjoy!!!

Brooklyn Decker Video:


Lindsey Vonn (US Olympic Team) Video: