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February 16, 2010

Silent Bob Has One Thing To Say... Southwest Airlines Can Suck It!!!

The past few days the media has been ablaze with a story about filmaker Kevin Smith. It seems that Smith was booted from a Southwest Airline flight from Oakland to Burbank because he was too fat... Now this might seem crazy to some of us, but the airline industry is scrambling to find new and exciting ways to squeeze more money out of travelers. The newest gimmick is to require heavier passangers to purchase two tickets. This way there is nobody in the seat next to you inconvienced by your size. But that is not the problem here. The problem is that fat people are become targets of objective bias, and thats not cool.

I am all for rules and regulations, in fact I encourage them. As a self proclaimed "fatty", I know I'm big. So make up a clear cut rule about it. Give a weight requirement, and if that person doesn't meet that requirement, then assess them the penalties accordingly. If the weight requirement is 285, anyone over 285 will have to buy two seats. Simple enough, right? No, it's not so simple. Airlines, like most corperations, are pussies. They are to scared to come out with a policy to offend people. So what they instead do is act like this. They have no dicernable policy, then AFTER BOARDING the plane make a judgement that a passenger is to big for one seat. They then rely on the fact that once they inform the obese passenger they will have to get off, the passenger will be so embarassed that they will either buy the additional seat or go along quietly as to not embarass themselves. But when they booted Kevin Smith, boy did they fuck up on multiple levels. 1) The guy is a comedian and writes comedic movies. He is going to make you look extremely stupid for the slight you made towards him. 2) He is a Twitter freak. He posts all day long and will keep smashing you to all his loyal fans on the social networking site. 3) He is Uber famous and will finally bring a spotlight to this unfair practice. Smith even went so far as to say that he normally buys a second seat on Southwest to be more comfortable, but in this case the flight was full and he was on a deadline. He fits into the seat, can buckle his belt, and didn't spill over onto the passenger next to him. There was no reason to discriminate against him, and I'm glad he is laying the smack down on them right now. FUCK SOUTHWEST AIRLINES!!!!!! If you want my respect, come up with a policy and stick to it no matter how biased it is. Do not leave it up to the personal opinion of your staff. Now feel the wrath and learn to stop being such assholes.... and make sure you check out Kevin Smith's new movie "Cop Out" with Bruce Willis and Tracy Morgan, coming to a theater near you on February 26, 2010.

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