Cultural Compulsive Disorder: DJ Jazzy Jeff and The Fresh Prince

I've been writing LOST episode recap blogs on my own for years now. Posting them everywhere from my large email friend-base to Myspace, to Lost board websites, to Facebook, to the blog site's of other friendly 'Losties'. This season I am honored to be posting the remaining recaps EXCLUSIVELY for Cultural Compulsive Disorder!!! Join me here each week for my futile Lost TV show ramblings, but tune in daily, for an endless array of movie, TV, music, comic book, fashion, and general geekdom that Mr. Mike D and his staff provides. Take a moment right now to make C.C.D one of your favorites, and please become a follower of the blog. (Just click follow over on the right hand side, sign in using one of the accounts provided Google, Aol IM, Yahoo, etc and watch your picture pop up.) Comments are always appreciated. Let's try and keep the spoilers limited to no more than the title and centricity (if that's a word) of the following weeks episode.

I drank the LOST Kool-Aid somewhere around episode 1 or 2 almost seven years ago. I have been loving the ride ever since. This season I have had my moments where I've let the pre-game hype of any one particular episode get the better of me and I've allowed myself to be let down on a few occasions when any one piece of the puzzle didn't live up to my own expectations. I since then have resolved NOT to let the hype machine ruin my viewing pleasure. That being said I let my guard down, once again, upon first viewing of this week's episode. I had expected a second 'Ab Aeterno' and was seeing something completely different. Something completely lackluster given what this episode COULD have been. Upon second viewing, however, my eyes opened up wide and the Kool-Aid started pumping through my veins at full force. What a beautifully done episode. Just pure magic. Oh you don't agree? Or maybe you do. Let's find out. Let's get right into it shall we?

Flashback

Sometime BEFORE Richard Alpert's arrival on the island, we're shown remnants of a demolished ship as it's wooden planks pepper the ocean. A woman, who bobs on a stray piece of driftwood comes in to view. She washes up on shore in a red dress and we see that she is very beautiful yet VERY pregnant. She stumbles into the jungle and kneels at a stream where she helps herself to some drinking water. In the stream's reflection we see that she is being watched by another woman, she turns to reveal her observer as Allison Janney! They speak in Latin with English subtitles. Allison Janney asks if the other is hurt and tells her she wishes to help her. The pregnant woman introduces herself as 'Claudia' (whom, by the way is the mother of the mythological brothers Romulus and Remus) as the the subtitles disappear and their Latin is now heard in English (presumably in an effort for us to understand, easier, the conversations which are about to happen or to given Allison Janney a rest because she seems like she's having a difficult time with the ancient language) "Where are the rest of your people," Claudia asks the woman. She responds that she is there alone and that she arrived there the same way Claudia did, by accident. Claudia begins to ask more questions and Allison Janney stops her. "Every question I answer will simply lead to another question," Janney remarks. (don't we know it! This statement feels like a direct nod to us, the viewers, who never seem to have all of our questions answered for us. A lot of us seem to get caught up in the unanswered questions while forgetting to sit back enjoy the wonderful ride that is LOST) "Just be grateful that you're alive," she adds. Claudia begins to tell Allison Janney about the other people from her shipwreck but, Janney assures her that she will find them for her in time. Claudia starts experiencing contractions and begins going into labor.

At a more domesticated area, Allison Janney coaches the mother through her the child labor. A few hearty pushes and a beautiful chubby little baby emerges. Allison Janney remarks that it is a boy to which Claudia responds, "His name is Jacob." (which sounds an awful lot like the exact same phrase Ben and a few others used in previous episodes in response to who their leader is....but that of course is the distant future.) Allison Janney tends to the newborn who she wraps in a light colored blanket. She turns back toward Claudia and is startled to find out there are more contractions "There is another baby," Janney announces. This one comes slightly more violently and, since it is to be the brother of Jacob, I expect black smoke to just rip out of Claudia's vagina....to no avail. (that would have been EPIC. Admit it) Another baby emerges, this one slightly less cherubic and covered in a little more ooze than the first. Allison Janney wraps this one in a darkly colored blanket as her expression changes from enjoyment into one of displeasure. "I only picked one name," Claudia remarks (pick one more, willya bitch?!) "May I see them?" Claudia asks. Allison Janney turns to Claudia once more. "I'm sorry," she says as she bashes the new mother's brain in with a rock. Post-maternal bludgeoning....Gruesome!

In the next scene, it is daylight near the shore and a young boy who looks like a younger Zach Effron dressed in dark clothing finds an ancient board game peaking out from the sand. 'Jumanji'! Fun...quick, wish for rhinoceros..no,no,monkeys, monkeys! No it's not Jumanji but, fellow LOST Blog writer Chris is first to point out to me that the board game is, in fact, Senet 'The Game of Passing'. The darkly dressed boy sets the game board up to play as his brother Jacob emerges from the jingle jangle jungle and wonders aloud what the new toy is. "It's a game," Dark Boy says, "you PLAY it," he adds. "How do you know," Jacob wonders. "I just know" Dark Boy rebuts. He'll show Jacob how to play if he promises not to tell their mother since, she'll take it away. (Their mother is probably going to be annoyed that they have games to play while she has to walk the island with massive head trauma)
Allison Janney weaves a tapestry (much like the one adult Jacob is scene making at the base of the statue in which he lived for some time....in the future again, of course) We realize Allison Janney has been raising these children as her own for some time now 13 years to be exact. She asks Jacob where his brother his and he tells her he is staring out into the ocean. "Do you love me," Allison Janney asks as she senses something is amiss. If so she expects him to tell her what has really happened.
(PHOTO MIB BOY) Fake Mother (Allison Janney) walks to the shore where she finds Dark Boy sitting on a log. "May I join you," she asks as she sits down beside him. Dark Boy knows why she has come to find him. "Jacob told you what I found," he hypothesizes. "Of course he did," Fake Mother responds, "Jacob doesn't KNOW how to lie. He's not like YOU," she continues. (Now, where I'm from that's some f*cked up sh*t for a mother to say to her boy, even a fake mother. Ease up, woman!) The boy wonders to her what he IS like. (Choose your next words wisely, Allison Janney!) "You're....SPECIAL," she clarifies. (Woman both your 'sons' seem kinda SPECIAL to me, short bus 'special' that is. This ain't news. They're the kinda special not even short buses are accustomed to. These two are 'home schooled' special. The kind of 'special' that comes from severe isolation from the outside world) "Can I keep the game," Dark Boy pleads unemotionally. "That's why I left it for you," she confirms to his surprise. (hmmm) "Where else would it come from," she tests. "From somewhere else," is his response, "FROM ACROSS THE SEA," he adds, looking out passed the ocean. "There IS nowhere else," Fake Mother condemns. "The island is all there is" she lies. (SHE F*CKIN' LIES!) Dark Boy asks where they came from and his fake mother reasonably answers that the brothers came from her (LIE) and that she came from her mother whom is dead. "What is dead," he enquires. (Any other time I'd ask 'must we get into this NOW?' But this is LOST, the answer might not be what you'd expect it to be.) "Something you will NEVER have to worry about," she assures him, kissing the boy gingerly.

Later, in the jungle, the two boys Zach and Jacoby get into some Tipton Troubles chasing a wild boar with spears. They are startled as the boar in question is killed by three large men straight out of 'Conan'.
The boys run back to their 'home' where they tell their fake mother all about what they saw. "They looked like us" they exclaim. "They ARE NOT like us," she admonishes. The boys want to be told more but she tells them that it is 'not time yet'. Well the times they are a-changin' because the next scene shows us that the boys are about to learn more than they bargained for. Fake Mother leads the two through the jungle blindfolded. They have many questions for her along the way. They ask if she knew about the people and she confirms that she does. She didn't tell the boys before now because the people are dangerous. "They come, they fight, they destroy, and they corrupt and it ALWAYS ends the same," she home schools them. (that SURE sounds familiar. Oh, yeah, that's the same line MIB has for Jacob upon admonishing him for bringing more castaways to the island when they are grown) "I've MADE IT so you can never hurt each other," she informs the boys. With that, the three arrive at a stream and Fake Mother removes their blind folds. They are amazed (as am I) by a glowing mouth in the rocks that the stream flows to. "This is the reason you're here," she tells them. Inside is the 'warmest, brightest light you've ever seen or felt' she insists (sounds like she knows from personal experience....later on that) "We must make sure no one ever finds it," she lectures. "A little bit of this VERY same light is in every man," she explains, "but, they always want more," she adds. (OK, gotchya so far. Why is it I find myself listening so intently to the islands known liars the closest? This could be the truth, or this could be the biggest whopper ever told. Never can tell) Jacob asks if the people can TAKE the light to which Fake Mother replies negatively. "But, they can still TRY," she informs them, "and if they try they can put it out," she warns. "If the light goes out here it goes out everywhere," she finishes. (Kinda like a bulb on a strand of Christmas tree lights....I reckon. I've figured this all out. LOST is a huge Christmas tree. Think about it. A huge Christmas tree indeed) She informs them that she's dedicated herself to protecting the island, specifically this divine light. "But, I can't protect it forever," she adds. When she can no longer protect it, one of the boys will have to take her place. They are 'candidates' for her protectorate position.

Some time later, the boys sit enjoying another game of Senet. Jacob tries to make a move (sideways, I believe) one Dark Boy will not allow because it is against the 'rules'. (is this kid still walking the island without a name?! SHEESH) "One day you can make up your own game and everyone else will have to follow YOUR rules," Dark Boy assures him. (Oh he will, and they do. It surely will be a tough game. Just ask our future 'candidates') Just then, the Dark Boy notices a woman over Jacob's shoulder. It is their REAL mum. Jacob, ironically, cannot see her. Dark Boy gets up to investigate. "Don't be afraid," Claudia whispers to her darkly dressed son. He inquires why Jacob cannot see her as well. "Because I'm dead," she answers. (Oh, THAT makes COMPLETE sense) She asks Dark Boy to follow her so that she can show him where he came from ACROSS THE SEA. The boy follows, through the brush, and in the clearing he sees a village full of people bustling around thatched huts and performing various activities (reminds me of one of our first sightings of the Others in 'Dharmaville'...'New Otherton' if you're nasty) "They came here thirteen years ago, a day before you were born," she informs him, "They came by ship, it's how WE came from ACROSS THE SEA. It's where YOU came from," she surprises him." Dark Boy doesn't know whom to believe, this woman or his own mother whom we know is a fake. Claudia informs him that SHE is in fact his real mother. (Search your feelings, Dark Boy, you know this to be true!)

Night time, the darkly dressed Zach Effron wakes a sleeping Jacob. He has all of their things packed and he informs him that THEY are leaving to be with their people. He informs Jacob that their fake mother lied to them and that she is, indeed, NOT their real mother. That she KILLED their real mother. ("Obi Wan told you what happened to your father?"..."He told me enough, he told me YOU killed him!" This is all starting to sound vaguely familiar) Jacob is enraged at his accusations. He attacks his darker brother and drops him to the ground, pummeling him. Fake Mother emerges from their camp and breaks up the altercation. Dark Boy accuses his fake mother of killing his real mum. He confirms that he is leaving to be with his people and that he is going home ACROSS THE SEA as his real mum told him. He implores Jacob to come with him. He insists that the dead woman is the real mother of BOTH of them. Jacob declines. "Whatever you have been told, you will NEVER be able to leave this island," Fake Mother more so insists than threatens. "That's not true and one day I will prove it," Dark Boy rages. (Call me a dreamer but I, for one, believe that we'll see that day)

By sunlight, the boy Jacob sits on a log gazing into the ocean. He is joined by his fake mother who sits beside him. Jacob asks if she did, indeed, kill their real mother as his brother suggested. She acknowledges this to be true. "If I'd let her live, she would have taken you back to her people," she reconciles. "People are BAD, Jacob, VERY BAD," she insists. I NEEDED you to stay good. (This explains a lot. It appears Allison Janney raised the two boys to be pure of heart, nonseduced by the temptations of the outside world, so that one of them would be selected to willingly protect the island as she probably was. A lesser 'candidate' might have their own best interests at heart. A candidate from the outside world would probably more interested in being near the 'precious', the pure island light that grants 'specialness') She goes on to explain how it is not true, as Jacob believes, that she loves her darkly dressed son more than she does Jacob. Like any mother, she loves her two 'children' differently. Young Jacob finds this reassuring and agrees to stay with her...if only but for a awhile longer.

Thirty years time has past. Jacob is now the elder Mark Pelligrino that used to shoot up heroine and threaten 'Dexter' on Showtime. He spins a plain tapestry on his own now that looks to be reflecting of the ocean (possibly an indication that he, too, wonders sometimes if something better awaits him across the sea) He leaves to go look upon his brother in the the village who is now the elder man in black who we first met on the beach in last season's finale. It seems as though they may meet regularly to play the game of Senet they had grown fond of us children. Over the game play the MIB wonders why Jacob comes to look upon his village. "I watch because I want to know if mother's right," Jacob responds. He wants to know if the others in the village are bad. Although he lives amongst them, MIB confirms this to be true. He lives amongst them as means to an end of getting off the island and going home. He confirms, however, "they're greedy, manipulative, untrustworthy, and selfish". He reinforces to Jacob that he is leaving, that he's found a way off the island. "Impossible, there is no way off the island," Jacob insists. To that MIB removes a dagger from his waist sheath and hurls it toward a nearby well. The dagger attaches itself to the bricking of the outer well wall, being pulled by large instances of electromagnetism that we know to rest in the underground terrain. MIB informs Jacob that his village inhabitants are some very smart people. That they've found hot spots on the island where metal behaves 'strangely'. When they find these hot spots they dig and create wells for easier access to these unexplained instances of electromagnetism. MIB requests once more that Jacob join him. They have a quick discussion about how their fake mother will not live forever and how Jacob will be left alone. Jacob denies this will be a possible outcome. He seems frightened by the very thought, however. (These guys have managed to nail 'home schooled' rubes down pat....sorry 'home schoolers' no offense!) Jacob declines his brother's offer once more and the two part ways.

Back at the domicile of Jacob and his fake mother. Allison Janney does something creepy with her bare legs that may have turned me on if she were 30 years younger. She asks Jacob where he was to which he insists she already knows the answer. Jacob informs her that his brother has found a way to leave the island. By which, his fake mother seems threatened.

Now Allison Janney looks upon the village of her 'son' the MIB. The MIB is down in one of the wells messing with some fiery hot coals. He is startled by a presence behind him to which he darts around, dagger in hand. It is his fake mother. "May I join you," she asks in a familiarly caring way. He tells her that he has been searching, with no results, for the mystical place that she took he and Jacob to when they were young. Then he decided maybe it was possible to find it by digging underground. He tells her he's found it in just such manner and that his fellow villagers have some interesting ideas on what to do with it. "What to DO with it," she repeats, "You have NO idea...." she starts. "I have no idea because you wouldn't tell me, mother," he interrupts. He turns and jostles a stone in the wall. He pulls it toward him carefully until the divine light from the other side peers through. Allison Janney notices the large donkey wheel (the same one, or one of the same ones last seen at the base of the well which led John Locke back to civilization) "It is a wheel. I'm going to make a larger opening. I'm going to attach that wheel and create a system....that channels the water and light," he explains to her, "Then I'm going to turn it and when I do than I'm finally going to be able to leave this place". (That would sound completely insane if we hadn't seen it work already for both Benjamin Linus and John Locke as they exited the island in previous seasons) He knows this to be true because he is 'special' (Hey, he said it....not me) Allison Janney pleads with her fake son not to go ahead with this plan to no avail. She seemingly caves in to his idea and says goodbye with a hug. "I am so sorry," she tells him, almost questioningly. With that she violently thrusts him backward, hitting his head on the rocky walls and leaving him unconscious.

Back at her home, Jacob sleeps. She sneaks up and wakes him carefully and informs him that 'it's time'. By torchlight she leads her obedient son through the jungle. She informs him that she had to say goodbye to his brother because that is how he wants things to be. They near water and we hear the familiar flow of the stream that flows from the gloriously lit cavern. Jacob recalls where they are now. Allison Janney confirms to him that Jacob is to be the area's new protectorate. "What's down there," he inquires. "Life, death, rebirth, Dave Chappelle," she divulges (Dave Chappelle isn't down there, but I thought liven things up a bit) "It's the source to the heart of the island," she continues" (didn't John Locke once comment that when he looked into the eye of the smoke monster, he saw into the heart of the island and that it contained a beautifully bright light?) "....No matter what you do you won't ever go down there," she insists he promise. "Would I die," he wonders (valid question, your honor...sustained)
"You'd be worse than dieing, Jacob, MUCH WORSE," his fake mother eerily responds. She presents a bottle of wine. The same or similar bottle that Jacob uses to describe what the island IS to Richard Alpert. She pours a mug of wine and mouths some incantation. (She sounds like a witch to me. A good ol' Disney Fairytale witch) With that, she extends the mug to her 'son' and tells him to drink of it. She informs him that once he drinks that he has accepted the responsibility of protecting the island as long as he can. Then, when he can no longer fulfill his duty, he will be tasked with finding his replacement. (Something tells me SHE has been a replacement to someone before her) Jacob declines her offer, he seems to be more fearful of the indication that if she is giving up her role as protectorate, that she may not be long for the world. "It HAS TO be you, Jacob," she insists. "You wanted it to be HIM," he defies, "but, now I'm all you have," he finishes. "It was ALWAYS supposed to be you, Jacob," she reassures him, "I see that Now. Please take the cup and drink," she pleads. Jacob drinks. "Now you and I are the same," she muses. (Crazy? Bipolar? 'Special'? Oh yeah!)
MIB awakens outside of the well, bloodied. He rises and is saddened to see that the well in which he was toiling in has been filled over. He peers past the destruction at the well and sees a stupendous plume of smoke rising from his village close by. He runs to see what has become and his shocked to see the village has been destroyed and all it's villagers massacred.
He stoops over to find his Senet game, burnt, poking through the debris. A look of pure anger spreads across his face.
Jacob and his mother walk together in the day time and discuss the impending storm. She instructs him to gather fire wood before it rains. She says goodbye to him in a way that indicates that she might know that this will be their last goodbye. "I'll see you back home," Jacob insists.

Back home, the fake mother returns to find her living quarters in the same condition she had seemingly left MIB's village. The tapestry has been destroyed and the game of Senet lays burnt on the floor. She opens the game board's compartment to reveal only two stones. One light....and one dark. As she contemplates the black stone intently, she is attacked by the MIB who plunges his dagger through her abdomen from behind. "Why wouldn't you leave, mother," he asks her seemingly begging for a straight answer before she meets her demise. "Because I love you," she replies, "Thank you," she manages sincerely with her last breath. MIB breaks down in tears as Jacob arrives home. Jacob is incensed. He attacks his brother once again pummeling him on the ground. "She was crazy," MIB pleads, "She burned them all," he tries to explain (EVEN THE YOUNGLINGS? I wonder to myself. Am I the only one injecting all these Star Wars connections this week?) "You can't kill me," MIB reminds his brother. (Oh, this rule of your fake mother's you still believe...how conveeeniant) "Don't worry, I'm not going to kill you," Jacob responds as he scoops up his brother and carries him to the stream at the source of the great light. "You wanna find the light," Jacob threatens. "You wanna leave this place, brother," he yells. (see you in another life, brutha) "Than go," Jacob angrily chants as he tosses him like a rag doll into the stream of water. His body floats lifelessly into the mouth of the stream and is sucked in to the source of the light as if it were the mouth of a vaccum cleaner. A very ancient vaccum cleaner. A few quiet seconds are followed by the familiar rumble and clangity-clang of our freinemy The Smoke Monster as he emerges for the first time from the light like a freight train and disappears into the jungle.
Jacob shakes off what he has just seen and heads down stream where he can wash his hands and face of the days dirty deeds. He spots his brothers body twisted and gnarled around the branches of a a tree limb that extended downward unto the brook. Jacob rushes to the body and cradles his lifeless head. Jacob carries him to a nearby cave and lays him out on a stone bed. He returns home to gather the body of the only woman he knew to be his mother and upon seeing the stones she was contemplating in her death, he wraps them in a little nut sack and takes both the pouch and the body of his mother to the cave to rest beside his brother. He places the sack in his brother's hand and joins the two family members hands together.......

Flash forward to season 1
Kate & Jack hover over the skeletons in the cave. He collects the pouch from them containing both the white and black stones. Kate wonders to Jack how they might have gotten there as if their appearance there is an unexplainable impossibility. "Didn't you and I shoot a polar bear last week," Jack points out "Where did THAT come from?" John Locke enters the cave as we've seen before and wonders who these 'men' are. "Actually, one is a woman," Jack corrects. "Our very own Adam...and Eve," he declares.
-I think it's safe to say that the mysterious blond child we've seen running the island at the most inopportune times for Smoke Locke, is his brother Jacob, dead on the island but appearing to his brother to remind him of the rules of the game they have been playing since Adam was separated from his body.

Things I'm Pondering:
-I posit that Jacob's brother may NEVER have been named. He was 'brother' to Jacob and 'son' to his mother. There was no real need to give him a name once it was revealed that his true mother hadn't thought of one for him. Now it may be true that the member's of his adoptive village may have named him something to call out to him. A name that we may still be alerted to before the series end. But until then, it appears, ironically that the first REAL name MIB is given is when he is a couple thousand year old corpse. His name is Adam.

It stood out to me that the two boys were perfect 'candidates' for Allison Janney to mold and manipulate from birth. Their isolation from the outside world made them perfect blank slates for their stepmother to fill with only the information they needed to become eternal protectorates. Basic things like what 'death' was and what evil meant. What a 'game' was. These are all things that they needed not trouble their mind with on their paths through 'candidacy'. They were truly like baby veals. The task of choosing a new 'candidate' seems infinitely more difficult in Jacob's final days as protector. He had to weed through full grown world-aware adults. Ones bent on in-fighting, destruction, and corruption.

I'd bet that Allison Janney aka Fake Mother aka 'Eve' was once just a 'candidate' herself and not the first. There's probably a grand back story as to how she was bestowed by the last protector of the island when his or her turn was up.

I'm taking a lot of 'leaps of faith' with my ponderings this week. The cards are almost all on the table and I feel like we're heading to a point where everything we need to form our conclusions have been given to us. We just need to stitch them all together. That being said, is it too soon to infer that Smoke Monster figured out a way to have former island castaways redig the well, install the wheel and create the exit to the 'real world' that we saw in season 4 and 5? If those are the same wells, why has the divine light been replaced with the arctic chill Ben had to don a winter coat to endure? Any thoughts on this, my villagers?

Does anyone think that Fake Mother was, in fact, a Smoke Monster herself? She purged the village of it's people singlehandedly. She also moved her stepson from the base of the well to the island floor above, while he was unconscious, single handedly. If then idea that she was a smoke monster as well is true, is it a very far 'leap of faith' to believe that she took the shape of the boys' real mother in order to manipulate MIB and set the ball rolling on her 'candidate' search? I can't quite wrap my noggin' around what that might mean for her status as protectorate of the island's properties. Is she both a Smoke Monster and a Protector? Does this imply MIB could, in fact, also be both the island's protector and it's smoke monster? Am I the smoke monster? Are YOU the a smoke monster? Let me see those hands! I never can tell anymore.

I propose that the glass of wine Jacob's fake mother forces upon him seals the deal, so to speak, and makes him ageless from there on in similar way to when Richard drank the wine that sealed his agreement with Jacob on the beach. The thought that Jacob now appears exactly the same age as he did in this scene speaks volumes as opposed to him appearing 13 years old for the remainder of his life....or 53, or 5 years old for that matter. Jacob Merlot ...ageless since the beginning of time...with just a hint of rosewood.

There's a completely logical scientific explanation as to why a physical omnipotent manifestation could be created by a hot spot, a pocket of electromagnetism so great, so forceful that it could separate one's soul from it's corporal body. That all sounds pretty brilliant but I assure you I have no f*ckin' clue what I just said. Is there a physics major in the house. Heeeeelp! A biochemist? A botanist? F*ckt, I don't even know what type of scientist I need to piece this sh*t together. Joe F, you got anything for me? I'm calling you out, son! You're the most sciencey guy I know. Anyone else? I needs the helps here.

This seems to be a very controversial episode. More than ever, I await your thoughts. I WILL watch this episode a third time. If only to watch Pelligrino and Welliver act their asses off as 43 year old man babies. F*cking brilliant. Those guys LOST all touch with reality. Jacob LOST his mommy, however deceitful and treacherous she was. Adam LOST his man-well, his electromagnetic soul and later LOST his black and white marbles. I'm sure he'll get them back, though. But who's going to give me back what I....
LOST

link to previous LOST blog for Season 6 Episode 14 'The Candidate'

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